Wow. What A BFF.

Overheard:

My friend and I are very close. We spend about five days a week hanging out and my daughter calls her Aunt Larissa. Well, we were hanging out watching a chick flick while the baby was sleeping and so we decided to give each other back rubs. I took off my wedding band and put it in the dish by the bed so it wouldn't get oil in it. She was the only person in my house besides my kids. I just remembered my ring was there, went to grab it, and it's gone!! I would think my DH did it to like remind me to be more careful, but he hasn't been home from work. What should I do???

This Person Missed A Lot of Sunday School

Overheard:

I'm going to come right out and say - I pick and choose from the Bible. I don't think it makes any sense to take everything in the Bible literally and feel you have to follow everything in it to the letter - there's not a person on this planet who does that. However, I think it's important to know why you follow particular parts of the Bible and not others.

For instance, you read a passage in the Bible that says you can't eat X, so you decide you're not going to eat X ever again. But why aren't you supposed to eat X? And who wrote that section of the Bible and who were they writing it to? Is that section of the Bible intended to apply to you?

The Bible isn't a "how to" book on how to live your life - if it were, it would be very difficult to follow it given all of its contradictions. The different books came from different authors, were intended for various audiences, etc. I think it's important to understand what's going on with the Bible beyond the words on the page so you can understand how the Bible applies to your life.

The Heart of the Matter

Hypothetical:

Your child receives a heart transplant and your extended family wants to know where the heart came from and what the age of the person was that donated the heart. Is this necessary info in the whole scheme of things? Why or why not?

What Was That Thing Called You Made On Your Wedding Day? Oh Yeah...a PROMISE...

Overheard:

I often hear people talk about divorce as though it's a bad thing. People say things like "just look at the divorce rate these days" to supply evidence for all sorts of ways in which they believe that values are eroding.

Meh. I say what's so bad about divorce anyway? Are climbing divorce rates really an indicator of our population's plummeting morals? If so does that mean that ppl who get divorced somehow have lower moral standards than people who don't divorce or that they did something wrong or bad?

Whose Choice Is It?

So a woman/couple decide, for whatever reason, to use a surrogate to have a baby. They enter a legal contract. Sometime during the pregnancy, they discover the baby is 'not perfect' (whatever that means).

Does the mother have the right to tell the surrogate to have an abortion (if abortion is the mother's preference) ?

Could a court force someone to have an abortion, in this case or ever?

So the Punishment *For* Murder Should Be...?

Overheard:

You talk about a value for life - but probably believe in the death penalty. I can't get my head around killing a healthy adult for a punishment. It seems incredibly cruel and barbaric to me, it is murder.

No, It's Just Double The Tax...

Overheard, while shopping the 25% off sale at The Gap:

"Is it 25% off each item or 25% off the total purchase of these items on sale?"

Response to overheard, from Gap Saleslady:

"Off each item!"

Well. That's One Way of Looking at It.

Overheard:

There is no need for the US to sustain the population. We (the planet) are overpopulated as it is. We should allow gays to marry to decrease the population, thus helping the environment.

So, all those in favor of green technologies and helping the environment should be in favor of gay marriage, as they cannot reproduce and continue overpopulating our planet.

First, the entire planet does not equal the US, or vice versa. Carry on.

Wow. Just, Wow.

Overheard:

My stepson has issues with being talkative at school and was diagnosed ADHD. He is 12 now (has lived with us since he was 9), so our consequences for this started when he was a little older than your son. He has since matured enough that the psychiatrist has said that he no longer needs ADHD meds, but must work to control his behaviors on his own. He is incredibly intelligent and knows better than to talk at school when it isn't appropriate.

He knows that if he gets in trouble at school for talking, he loses the privilege of speaking at our home for the evening. He must raise his hand and wait to be acknowledged (unless someone is bleeding or is in imminent danger) or he is given push-ups, sit-ups, etc.

If we have to go out, I've got labels printed which state "I'm not trying to be rude, but I cannot speak to you. I've lost the privilege since I would not maintain control of my mouth/speech today at school." He wears them without complaining.

Pick Me! Pick Me!

Overheard:

I make $40/hr. which I know sounds like pretty good cake but we live in a very HCOL area (Boston) and we still struggle check to check and the sad thing is that my DH probably makes about $45/hr. We're both in the IT field. Crazy, I probably should hire someone to be our financial advisor.

Uh...Guilty?

Overheard:

Christianity is one of those lovely religions that enforces in its followers a sense of obligation to convert and "save" all the other souls on the planet who might have other beliefs. Those other beliefs are irrelevant and SATANIC according to born again Christians. I was raised as one. I know lots about it.

This May Not Bode Well For Lots Of Us

Overheard:

"The best your (married) relationship is going to be is how it is when you're dating."

Agree or disagree? Why?

Hmm. And, Wow. The Sequel.

Overheard:

My BF had like 500 girlfriends before me, and then he had about 300 more chicks that wanted to sex him. He also cheated on me a couple times early in our relationship.

So he JUST made a Myspace account, and chicks from the past are already hunting him down. I have his password, so I can check it out and all, but he thought he could erase some of em before I would see how many women are trying to be flirty. I was able to see a couple messages, where the chick apologized saying she was sorry for being naughty she didn't know he had a lady, etc. Then this other chick who he cheated on me with has been messaging him, he they havn't, and I checked the "sent" folder, empty, but then I checked "inbox" and seen their messages. I'm not threatened that he will cheat, she lives halfway across the country and is married w/ a new baby, but still!

ARE YOU OK W/ YOUR MAN BEING FRIENDS W/ PEOPLE LIKE THIS?

Um

Overheard:

He's an ass, but that doesn't make him an *abuser*. He never hit anyone, just called his wife names.

You See *NO* Reason...? In My House, I'd See Three Reasons...

Overheard:

My kids are up at the ungodly hour of 6 a.m. I see no reason to get up at 6 so they get themselves ready in the morning and I stay in bed until I'm ready to get up. I'm usually up about 2 hours later.

Can't fathom it. Truly.

Hmm. And, Wow.

Overheard:

My son has only eaten out at fast food places with play places.

He asked today to go to a Chinese place. Don't know where he got that from. So tomorrow I'll take him. If he does not behave we will leave.

I'm a tad jumpy about this. He's never been to a place that expects kids to behave.

But he's 4.5 now, so is it time to see how he does in a place that does not have a drive though line?

A Pro Life Choice

Hypothetical:

You are trapped in a burning building with a five year-old child and a freezer with three embryos that are supposed to be implanted in a woman's uterus tomorrow. You can't carry the embryos and the child at the same time. You have to choose either 3 embryo babies or one five year old child. Who do you save and why?

I Think Maybe, Just Maybe, It *Might* Be "Something Else". Just Maybe.

Overheard:

On several occasions my husband has noticed other moms being less than friendly toward me when we are out together. I'll strike up a conversation with a mom who has a child similar age to my own. I'll keep asking questions, lots of smiles and seeminly warm, but I'll usually get a short, obligatory response with no follow up questions. My husband thought this behavior was odd and came to his own conclusion that I am shunned by unattractive moms because I am good looking (bless his heart!).

I don't necessarily agree with him. I think it might be many factors. Some people might not be friendly toward strangers or not warm in general. I may have some yet to be determined x factor that puts other mothers off. What has been your experience. Is this real? Is it because I'm good looking or probably something else?

Yours? Mine? Ours?

Hypothetical:

You are married with children. You have been working to pay down your household debt. You each get an "allowance" (blow money, if you will) of $200, weekly. With about $3,000 remaining on the debt, your spouse decides to purchase a customization kit for his pickup truck. He has been saving his blow money over time (cutting back on eating out, and driving his commuter car) and has enough to purchase the customization kit with cash. You balk at the idea, saying the $3,000 should go towards paying off the rest of the debt and that he shouldn't use it to buy "toys". He claims it is *his* blow money, *he* saved it, and *he* can do whatever he likes with it.

Go.

Well, He IS the Owner...

Hypothetical:

Your 13 year old son is not circumcised. When he was born, you railed and railed against circumcision, stating that "the owner of the penis should be the one to make the choice."

At 13, your son decides he'd like to be circumcised. The procedure requires your signature since he is a minor. You refuse to sign.

Is this ethical on your part?

SELF Centered? Or GOD Centered?

Overheard:

I believe that the attitudes and teaching of Christianity have led to it being a bigot religion. No other religion that I have encountered is so self centered - everyone needs to be Christian, all non Christians are going to hell, God only accepts Christians, etc.

Yeah, Because That's the ENTIRE Point of the Bible.

Overheard:

The Bible didn't create a bias against homosexuality. Some men created a bias and then decided to write the Bible to support it.

That Depends Upon One's Definition of "Man"...Or Does It?

Overheard:

Only a man can teach a boy to be a man... Women can teach boys to do the right thing and show them how to treat women, but not how to be a man. That's why we have so many grown boys now.

Note to Self: My Children Will Not Date Your Children.

Overheard:

No way would I consider or recommend my children wait (until marriage to have sex). I think people should have an active sex life and have multiple partners before they settle down in their late 20s or 30s+. Sex is a wonderful thing, adults need to have more of it with more people. In fact, I'd prefer my kids to have casual sex at 18 and 19 over getting married at such a young age.

There's This Great Thing Called the New Testament of Jesus Christ....

Overheard:

As a Christian, do you follow EVERYTHING the bible says?

Do you know the entire contents of the Bible?

If you know the Bible in it's entirety, then you must know that there are Bible verses that condone rape... among other verses that have other negative messages. Do you follow what those verses teach as well?

Knowing that the Bible condones such things, why do you still chose to follow a religion/book that is okay with such terrible things?

I'm Not Nagging, I'm Gently Reminding...

Hypothetical:

The wife asks the husband once a day to finish painting the bathroom, which has needed touched up/trimmed for six weeks or so. Every evening, instead of painting the bathroom, the husband sits and watches TV or surfs Craigslist. Every morning when the wife asks the husband to please finish painting the bathroom, the response is "Stop nagging."

Conversely, every day, the husband "reminds" the wife, several times, how much work she did not get done (while she was caring for the children)--things like vacuuming, ironing, or cleaning the bathroom more than a quick touch up. She is told, constantly, how these things are her job, and how he is tired of having to remind her to do something.

Are both spouses nagging? Is this the same thing? Discuss.

Since When Is It All About FEELINGS?

Overheard:

It is better to be happy and divorced than unhappy and married. I don't believe in making very bold promises at the age of 25 or whatever and expecting them to last a lifetime. I took crap like that out of the vows I made with my husband.

Discuss.

The Passion of the Christ Was Rated R For a Reason...

Overheard (kinda--from an Amazon review of the ESV Study Bible):

Some places were violent and even sexual in nature, I was led to believe this version was going to make the bible more kid friendly, I was wrong.

Yeah. Because there was NO sex, blood, or gore in Bible times. Not at all.

That Depends Upon One's Definition of "Honest" I Suppose

Overheard:

I really wish people would listen to (the President). I do believe he is the first truly honest man we have had as president for many years, and I uphold him.

Can't. breathe. Head. hurts. from. trying. to. wrap. it. around. this.

I Love You, Man?

Overheard:

My husband and I were with a friend of his and my IL's today. My husband is 43 and this friend (male) is about 55. When we were leaving this guy's work, my husband was talking to him and said "I love you" to him. When we were walking away, I asked my husband "did you just tell him that you love him?" and he said "yes". I said I thought that was weird and he said that this guy signs all his emails to him that way (I love you). Then this guy walked us to our car and my FIL was making fun of my husband's hair and this guy said "it's okay I think it's beautiful. See y'all later".

So would this weird you out? FWIW, my husband and I have sex about once every 3 weeks if anyone needs to know that.

Hmm.

And, wow.

What Part of "'Til Death Do Us Part" Is Difficult to Understand, Exactly?

Overheard:

How long is too long to work on your marriage?

Um. I don't know. Define VOW. Or DEATH.

Apparently "Monumental" Is Relative. Like "Truth."

Overheard (Not really "overheard" but an actual conversation between me and...someone else. One of those "You had to hear it to believe it" sort of conversations.):

Her: You look good. You've lost weight. How much have you lost?
Me: 22 pounds.
Her: Wow. Good for you.
Me: Thanks. You know, (mutual friend) has lost over 100 pounds. 120, I think. Maybe more.
Her: Wow! I had no idea she was trying to lose weight. That's awesome.

(Go on about our day and have other conversations. Later....)

Her: Did you go to So-And-So's birthday party?
Me: No, we were on vacation.
Her: Oh. Well, I was there. (Wouldn't she have known if I was there, then? Regardless.) And (mutual friend mentioned above) was there, too. So, that was good. I got to see her.
Me: Wait. You saw (mutual friend) a month ago, and you're SURPRISED she lost 120 pounds?
Her: Yeah, well, I don't usually notice unless it's something monumental.

*headdesk*
*facepalm*

Abracadabra, I Raise You From the Dead

Overheard:

If conservative Christians are opposed to kids learning about a magical world and the art of doing magic, how do they reconcile that with Jesus raising people from the dead and instantly curing ailments (like leprosy and the crippled)?

Jesus was a lot of things, but He wasn't *magic* for crying out loud.

You Will Always Have The Poor Among You, But You Will Not Always Have Me-- John 12:8

Overheard:

God does not desire or intend for anyone to live in economic poverty.

Discuss.

No, I Just Want Him to Be a *Legal* Doctor

Overheard:

This morning I was given a physical by the son of Haitian immigrants. He grew up to be a doctor. Conservatives don't want him to be American.

Um. WHAT?

Guess Where You WON'T Be Spending Christmas This Year

Hypothetical:

Your father-in-law has an affinity for marijuana. It's a hobby, let's say. He drives a school bus for a living. Do you call the dispatch office and tattle on his hobby?

Not Even Sure Where to Start Here

Overheard:

No one should have to live on one salary if they don't want to. So, the government really needs to subsidize daycare expenses.

Ever Hear of Catharsis, Moron?

Overheard (from a woman):

You can't tell me Rihanna didn't put her hands on Chris Brown during their altercation. And the fact that she collaborated with Eminem on his song about abuse just makes me want to blame her more. If this really happened to her--and I doubt it--she brought it on herself. I've stopped buying her music but wholeheartedly support him.

Not Even Remotely Close to the Same Thing

Overheard:

Illegal Immigration is not a new problem. The Native Americans used to call it "white people."

Because It's All About the Health Foods

Overheard:

Fruit roll ups are so bad for my kids. I'm just going to give them fruit snacks, instead.

Not That There's Anything Wrong With That

Overheard:

Over half of America is on Food Stamps. Doesn't that indicate food is a right, not a privilege?

What the Wha?

Overheard:

Tiger and Elin divorcing. Thanks, married gay people.

Home Alone?

You are a childcare provider responsible for five children on any given day. You have two of your own, 17 and almost 12.

Your seventeen year old needs picked up from an appointment one morning. Rather than grab the 8 year old, 8 month old, 4 year old, and 19 month old and go through the rigmarole of buckling them all up in their appropriate car seats, you decide to dash the fifteen minutes (round trip) by yourself to pick up your teenager, leaving the four children in the care of your almost-12-year-old.

Your state law indicates children must be 12 years old before you can leave them home alone for any length of time.

Have you technically broken the law here?

You Do Know That You Are Still Ultimately Responsible For Your Debt, Do You Not?

Overheard:

In 2008 I became a single mother to four children. As you'd expect, there were financial hardships as a result of our separation and ultimate divorce. In April of 2009 I was ONE month behind on my mortgage and called to see if I could have that month's payment deferred. That call began 16 months of Bank of America loan modification hell. It is still ongoing. Even though I had only called asking for a month's deferment, the woman on the phone suggested I apply for a loan modification saying "it couldn't hurt to try." How wrong she was! As a result of Bank of America "helping" me, what was once only one month in arrears has swelled to almost $26,000 in arrears. And even though Bank of America told me repeatedly that they would not just expect me to come up with the arrearage amount should I be declined a modification, telling me there were other programs in place to help with the back due amount, that is exactly what they are doing. If I don't pay the $26,000, they will take my house. I made every modification payment early and I sent every document ever requested of me. In the end, they are going to screw me and my four children out of our home, even though the only thing I did wrong was to follow their advice for assistance.

Zero-Buck Chuck?

Hypothetical:

While grocery shopping for a dinner party, you select six bottles of wine. Upon checkout, your total is $25.xx. Glancing at your receipt (because this seems low) you notice that the cashier only rang you up for two of the six bottles.

WWYD?

Tick-Tock Goes the Biological Clock

Hypothetical:

You are divorced after a very short (less than a year) marriage. You divorced your spouse because he was emotionally and verbally abusive, and physically a couple of times. (You left after the last physical incident.)

Less than a year after your divorce, you start dating a man that you eventually fall in love with. He divorced his spouse about three years ago because she was physically and emotionally unfaithful to him.

In other words, you both have baggage.

Neither of you has children. You are in your early 30's and want to have children before you get "too old". He wants children--you think. You haven't *really* discussed it.

You have, in your mind, set a time limit on advancing the relationship with your new boyfriend. You have determined that if he has not proposed marriage and set a date by the time you've been dating for one year, you will walk away from the relationship. You consider this a personal boundary, put in place to protect yourself and your emotions. Hence, you have not shared this time limit with your boyfriend.

Is this fair?

That Depends Upon One's Definition of "Heart" I Suppose

Overheard:

Divorce is worse than abortion because real hearts are broken.

Choose Life?

Hypothetical:

Your child is born with a disease or condition that, while not fatal, is difficult to manage and requires almost constant medical care. The condition was noticed and discussed at a 22-gestational-week ultrasound. At some point in your young child's life, you learn that said condition could have been caught at an earlier ultrasound--one within the time frame for termination of pregnancy. Ok, call it what it is: abortion. At any rate. You learn, after perusing your medical records, that there were markers at week 15 that should have been spotted and were never mentioned.

Because your child's condition is so hard on the family, and is breaking you financially, you decide, upon learning this information, to sue for "wrongful birth". In other words, you sue your obstetrician for not advising you to abort your child. This is not recognized in all states but it is in yours. Your obstetrician is your best friend and the child's godmother.

To win the lawsuit you'll have to prove (by lying) that your life would be better off without your sick child.

Discuss.

You Can Start By Trying to Remember the Date of Your Own Wedding...

Overheard:

My best friend, who I met on Facebook, is getting married on my ten year dating anniversary. Do you think she'll be offended if I don't go to the wedding since my husband might have a trip planned? I mean, it's my frigging anniversary, for crying out loud!

What to do, what to do?

Overheards and Hypotheticals

On my Facebook page, I run a somewhat popular (depending upon your definition of the word) feature that I call "Overheard" or "Hypothetical". In these postings, I present either hypothetical situations (which may or may not be based on actual, real-life situations, and which may or may not happen to me or people I may or may not know) for discussion (kind of like a WWYD) or statements I may or may not overhear (or read on a message board, or somewhere online, or in a book, or a magazine) or may or may not be said to me or people I may or may not know, also for discussion.

These are usually the most popular posts on my FB page, so I gave them their own home on the internet. Feel free to discuss, hypothesize, or facepalm at your leisure.

To protect myself and my Facebook page--since you may or may not know who I am--I am choosing to remain anonymous on my blog. As a disclaimer, I do not discriminate in my overheards or hypotheticals. They are not meant to be inflammatory--just honest.

Enjoy!